"Who Am I?"

                      Biennale de la Céramique, Exhibition "Frontiere" , Andenne, Belgium

„Who Am I?” work philosophy

                „Who Am I?” - is the continuation  of my „Ceramics Theatre”. This project, as most of my work, describes different human behavior. My work is strongly related to psychology, but is not so much based on its theoretical/scientific terms. What it reflects is my own understanding of identities.
 The concept of the project originated in my earlier experiments in ceramics lithography; in new ideas in collages and sketches; my personal experiences in a new environment, not to say, a different world which was leaving Romania for Holland.
       The Ceramics Theatre is a project that is still evolving and constructing itself with time. It probably is a project that causes a lifetime involvement. The reason of its open-ended organization is the strong relation between me and my theatre characters, the actors. Some characters represent me; others people that I have met and known; or that are around me; yet others are simply creations of my imagination.

           The theatre as it is now consists of different parts. The first part – “Spoken through my fingers”- is composed and “played” by hand puppet characters, they are very fantastic and fictional. The puppets create different theatrical scenes that explain their different stories. 

              The second part – ”The children of the theatre” – is a world of dolls .The characters from this part of the theatre visualize different hybrid images of the same baby doll puppet. The “perfect” image of the baby doll is distorted and its beauty is shown in different light. This work was created as a repulsion against the obsession with perfection that is present in this days.

              "Strings", the third part is strongly influenced by the past actors (naturally) but it depends on much more complicated and deeper characters both in technical approach and in conceptual meaning. The characters reveal more symbolism. This part of theatre is more strongly linked to reality. It is an image of control, manipulation and sexuality. Mostly it has its focus on identities, lack of identity, multiple identity or hidden identities. My characters are either strong personalities that play with e“motion” to manipulate and control - or weak ones lacking definite personality or with multiple personality in search of approval and acceptance. The talk is about integration, what do we do or are willing to do to belong in a “world”. The actors are images of different human characters and behavior. Their creation is not based on beauty, love and comfort, but it is a statement, about dichotomy, what we pretend to be and what we actually are. Fact is, we still struggle with acceptance in the world, no matter what the situation is: crossing borders - immigration or simply to be approved just because we are different. We might NOT cross any border just because we are afraid, but what if crossing borders might mean crossing the rights of others?
     Strong symbols in these theatrical scenes are the strings that hold some of the puppets: control and manipulation. The appearance of masks and loose heads indicates confusion. Even if this part of the Theatre has a deceptively gentle and sensitive appearance, it also shows the roughness of femininity and a slight confusion of sexuality. It is a world of obscure lies. The characters are hiding behind their masks while uninhibitedly playing (with) emotions. The dark environment of the scene …. we keep our eyes half-closed and react in denial of what we dislike and/or don't understand.

               „Who Am I?” - In my research about identity I came across the world of Transgenders and Transvestites.  Being much impressed by their stories and experiences in the change of identity  I was inspired to start the work „Who Am I?”. It centers around and enhances and develops the struggle of identity, it expresses thoughts and emotions in the search of identity and its acceptance. It represents the double life they have to live and the double identity  they have to carry. It is a sensitive discussion of how must it feel to be trapped in someone's else body. Always looking in the mirror and not seeing your own reflection. We all have a moment when we search for our identity to try and discover ourselves. Some of us are accepted as we are and others are denied. We tend to accept only what we understand and makes us comfortable. What we consider to be „normal”. But what is normal? And who decides it?

             The work talks about the process of transformation. The struggle and the pain it reflects, having to hide the real identity because of the fear of denial. 

  „Inside out”- reflection of the inside image and the outwards image. This work represents the mans body in a woman's skin. In front of him he sees the reflection  of his inner self.

                                               

 

    „Body vs mind”- through its dramatically curved body, this work signifies the pain and struggle of still hidden transformation. The fear of non-acceptance and the regret of not being able to share real life moments.

   

 
  „She...he...”- this work represents the doubt, balancing between sexualities. The awareness of insecurity of the real identity.

     

               Who I was and Who I am. From Past to Present. Black to white. Female to male.

 I am the same!

  

                

Documentation photography

"Coffee and cigarettes"

                  My work is mostly conceptual and figurative. It expresses my personal thoughts and imagination. It is a research into human mind and body, the way I see and understand it. It also represents a strong development in discovering, myself. My work thus reflects me and my experiences. Although my pieces are fictional/imaginary in character they always express a true story. A personal story possibly someones else's. I prefer a fantastic approach over a realistic one just because I like to see where my imagination can go. My work is mostly spontaneous and first appears in my dreams or as a vision. From these the pieces are hand-built directly without putting my thoughts in lines on paper. This way the idea is clear but the shape is an exciting surprise. I use a wide variety of techniques, for a solid expressiveness in different approaches.